Raoul Duke - completely irrational

So i can’t sleep, its pretty pathetic really, i should just go run a mile & then pass out.  But the thought keeps crossing my mind, what if i had a pocket full of drugs?

I could sure go for an oxycontin 20mg right about now.

The initial rush like a warm front moving in off the gulf stream, then running into a cold air system right in the center of my opioid receptor region. And then 45 minutes later, without warning “BOOM” dopamine flows freely, you’re lost in a steady flood of absolute joy.  Everything becomes significant, all your old football injuries disappear as if you’ve amazingly traveled back in time in a flash of brilliant warm itchy white light.

All is right with the world, your jackass boss seems almost comical, the bill your behind on becomes a joke.  Yes hillbilly heroin indeed, if Jed Clampet had this back in his day, it may well have been called The Beverly Nose Itches.

But alas there would be no oxycontin, nor vicodin, nor even a single lowly Tylenol 3 tonight, just a set of painful legs & some weed no doubt hustled over the canadian border patrol, that quite honestly wasn’t manicured, flushed or cured properly.

Until Tomorrow,
Raoul Duke

I decided to launch raoulduke.org tonight after a few joints & some hosting tweaks. Apparently it’s asking too much to have a blank default index.html from the hosting company, so i was sandbagged into thinking the name server was inappropriately pointing to a corporate 404 error.

I had spent an hour on live support before the clearly foreign technical adviser figured this out for me. “Sir please delete the default index.html & it should work fine” Thank you sir, for spending an hour of my time to figure that out Mr. foreign guy, I’ll be sure to send praise for your hard work & diligence to your boss first thing in the morning!

It’s times like this that make me proud to be an American. Sure all of our customer service gets outsourced overseas now and sure it makes an average tech support ticket a full dental surgery. But you know what, at the end of the day, when i goto the strip club, and the waitress has my cold Heineken waiting for me, and the dj had a kid rock song on for me, it reminds me just how nice good customer service is here in the good old u.s of a. You’ll never be able to outsource our strippers, dj’s & restaurant managers you dirty bastards, so we’ll always have that going for us!

So a rather ominous to the very beginning but there is plenty of good news to be had ladies & gents. The hosting this blog resides on is in Amsterdam, Netherlands. You know what that means right? Plenty of pictures of drunken orgies, weed, stolen street signs, cars on fire, firearms, titties, boobs, drugs, sex & rock n’ roll. Why you say is this possible? Because its in an offshore location, you can’t fucking touch it! So we can bypass the draconian patriot act laws of the 4th Reich.

So strap on your safety belt and visit quite often, so you can see what kind of fucked up shenanigans we get into tomorrow!

Did i say drug money?

Titties?

Firearms?

Thats right when you come to Raoul Duke’s site, you get the best in counter culture entertainment. So please take a moment to bookmark us. Trust me you won’t ever be bored with my format. (thats a fact, so prove me wrong and e-mail me if you’ve got an issue with a article.